Sequel to the post on Linda Ikeji's blog on thursday 23rd of October,2014 concerning Chebe Snr and a certain diiadem's munched conversation! Am so sure you all saw it, well i got a mail from chebe and he asked me to post it on my blog. HERE YOU GO!!!
I was at home and i noticed tons of pending requests on my BBM,I did not accept any because i suspected something was wrong !I received a call from one of my close friends who informed me about the said conversation on INSTAGRAM(CHEBE_SNR). I have not logged on to any of my social accounts,i couldnt put the picture together so after the call i tried to sign in to my facebook but i got an error message saying my password was wrong. Suprisingly my gmail and instagram gave the same error messages,then i was convinced something was indeed amiss,i contacted a friend who confirmed my accounts had been hacked. Within the same hour i got a debit alert from diamond bank on my phone and a call followed from diamond bank head office in lagos,the bank's representative informed me that an invalid pin had been used on my internet platform. I confirmed to the person who called me that i was not the one and he advised me to visit the nearest diamond bank branch to unblock my account.
Since thursday i have not been myself, i have been insulted on blogs and chat platforms. The results of the hack has caused a lot of hurt for me in the last 24hours. I am writing this piece to clear the mess the hacker created.
I am from a respectable background and i have deep respect for women, I also dont use social platform for such immoral purposes.
I hope this will simmer down the heat generating on several blogs at the moment.
Thanks .
Friday 24 October 2014
Tuesday 7 October 2014
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIBI!!!
You have been there for me no matter what I am going through. I love you, my dear friend, and I am so excited to share this special birthday with you. This day is going to be truly special and I am so excited.
you deserve the best birthday in the world and my goal is to give it to you. Happy Birthday and let’ get ready to celebrate. The party starts as soon as we are together.
On your birthday, I like to take some time and think about all the wonderful times we have had together. I’m thankful for our special adventures and all the things that we have done as friends and I look forward to making many more memories with you.
There are so many things about our friendship that I love. Your birthday is going to be the perfect time to celebrate your day and all that our friendship means to me. I look forward to showing you how much I care.
I can’t believe how lucky I am to have found a friend like you. You make every day of my life so special. It’s my goal to make sure your birthday is one of the most special days ever. I can’t wait to party it up. lol i wish.have all the fun without me.
love you
you deserve the best birthday in the world and my goal is to give it to you. Happy Birthday and let’ get ready to celebrate. The party starts as soon as we are together.
On your birthday, I like to take some time and think about all the wonderful times we have had together. I’m thankful for our special adventures and all the things that we have done as friends and I look forward to making many more memories with you.
There are so many things about our friendship that I love. Your birthday is going to be the perfect time to celebrate your day and all that our friendship means to me. I look forward to showing you how much I care.
I can’t believe how lucky I am to have found a friend like you. You make every day of my life so special. It’s my goal to make sure your birthday is one of the most special days ever. I can’t wait to party it up. lol i wish.have all the fun without me.
love you
ANXIETY
So i guess we are all doing ok! my post law school life has been remarkable, i should apply for like a sleep contest or something because i am a "pro" now! :)
its about seven days to the release of our bar 2 results*sigh* trust me i have taken over from Joseph the dreamer from the HOLY BIBLE. CHAI! i have been dreaming sha o. something weird happens often, i observed that waiting for these results has somewhat affected the conversations i have with peeps!*hehehehe* rumors! gists! na only GOD know sha o!
Anyway we are all anxious but i suggest we keep believing that ALL WILL END WELL. In the mean time, get fixed, for those of us who sleep,sleep!,for those who work ,focus! ICC ABUJA can NEVER be complete without YOU.
Till next time. Am off to sleep!:)
its about seven days to the release of our bar 2 results*sigh* trust me i have taken over from Joseph the dreamer from the HOLY BIBLE. CHAI! i have been dreaming sha o. something weird happens often, i observed that waiting for these results has somewhat affected the conversations i have with peeps!*hehehehe* rumors! gists! na only GOD know sha o!
Anyway we are all anxious but i suggest we keep believing that ALL WILL END WELL. In the mean time, get fixed, for those of us who sleep,sleep!,for those who work ,focus! ICC ABUJA can NEVER be complete without YOU.
Till next time. Am off to sleep!:)
Thursday 2 October 2014
UGLY BREAK UPS!!!
Breaking up is especially difficult when only one wants to end the relationship. The one who is left is in a great deal of emotional pain from the grief and loss. He or she also feels powerless to do anything about their circumstances. Often they do not know how to handle the pain, which feels unbearable and seems never ending. For some people, shifting into anger seems to alleviate their pain. Actually, anger just masks pain. But masking the pain may be preferable to feeling it. The pain does not go away; it just goes underground and influences behaviors in negative ways.
Sometimes breakups turn ugly. One or both parties start behaving in ways that are inappropriate, perhaps even frightening. Behaviors such as stalking, threatening verbally and physically, name calling, complaining to your friends/co-workers, making unwanted phone calls, sending unwanted text messaging and emails, damaging property, stealing from your partner and worse, make a breakup ugly.
Scenario 1) John finally ended his two year and half relationship with Mary after months of vacillating back and forth. It was not working out for him and he did not want to invest any more of himself in it. Mary was devastated and she pleaded with John to give her another chance. John’s resolve weakened and they did reconcile for a few months. But the same unpleasant dynamics between them repeated, so he ended it again. Mary refused to accept the breakup. She kept calling John and begging him to reconcile. She kept driving by his home. She left messages on his car. She called his friends trying to solicit their help. She sent him ecards, long hysterical emails and emotional text messages. John felt sorry for her and would take her calls and answer her messages. He kept explaining in a caring way that the relationship was over for him. When John was nice to Mary, her hopes for reconciliation increased. She tried harder to have contact with John. She knew that her behavior was harming what little relationship they had left, yet she could not stop herself. John’s compassion for her shifted into disgust. He felt badgered and victimized. He avoided all contact with her and after several months Mary gave up.
Scenario 2) After breaking up and reconciling five times, Judy decided to end her 4 year relationship with Marty for good. As before, Marty begged and pleaded with her to take him back. When she wouldn’t, Marty became angry and bitter. He started making phone calls and hanging up. He started threatening her. At first he would make statements such as ‘You better watch out.” Then the statements escalated into “I’m going to kill you.” Judy was frightened and did not know what to do. She was afraid to talk to her parents. She talked to all of her friends trying to figure out what to do. She talked to him and told him that he was frightening her, but it did no good. Sometimes he would switch from bitterness to apology but when she would not agree to give him another chance he shifted back into anger and rage. He wanted her to hurt as much as he was hurting. When he saw the fear in her eyes and heard the fear in her voice, he knew he was still able to have an impact on her. It was not the impact he wanted to have but it was better than feeling powerless. One time when he saw her going into a pub with another guy he keyed her car. The destructive action gave him some relief from the pain of seeing her with another guy. (All scenarios are fictitious).
Sometimes breakups turn ugly. One or both parties start behaving in ways that are inappropriate, perhaps even frightening. Behaviors such as stalking, threatening verbally and physically, name calling, complaining to your friends/co-workers, making unwanted phone calls, sending unwanted text messaging and emails, damaging property, stealing from your partner and worse, make a breakup ugly.
Scenario 1) John finally ended his two year and half relationship with Mary after months of vacillating back and forth. It was not working out for him and he did not want to invest any more of himself in it. Mary was devastated and she pleaded with John to give her another chance. John’s resolve weakened and they did reconcile for a few months. But the same unpleasant dynamics between them repeated, so he ended it again. Mary refused to accept the breakup. She kept calling John and begging him to reconcile. She kept driving by his home. She left messages on his car. She called his friends trying to solicit their help. She sent him ecards, long hysterical emails and emotional text messages. John felt sorry for her and would take her calls and answer her messages. He kept explaining in a caring way that the relationship was over for him. When John was nice to Mary, her hopes for reconciliation increased. She tried harder to have contact with John. She knew that her behavior was harming what little relationship they had left, yet she could not stop herself. John’s compassion for her shifted into disgust. He felt badgered and victimized. He avoided all contact with her and after several months Mary gave up.
Scenario 2) After breaking up and reconciling five times, Judy decided to end her 4 year relationship with Marty for good. As before, Marty begged and pleaded with her to take him back. When she wouldn’t, Marty became angry and bitter. He started making phone calls and hanging up. He started threatening her. At first he would make statements such as ‘You better watch out.” Then the statements escalated into “I’m going to kill you.” Judy was frightened and did not know what to do. She was afraid to talk to her parents. She talked to all of her friends trying to figure out what to do. She talked to him and told him that he was frightening her, but it did no good. Sometimes he would switch from bitterness to apology but when she would not agree to give him another chance he shifted back into anger and rage. He wanted her to hurt as much as he was hurting. When he saw the fear in her eyes and heard the fear in her voice, he knew he was still able to have an impact on her. It was not the impact he wanted to have but it was better than feeling powerless. One time when he saw her going into a pub with another guy he keyed her car. The destructive action gave him some relief from the pain of seeing her with another guy. (All scenarios are fictitious).
TOXIC FRIENDSHIPS!!!!
Have you ever felt as if your friend was verbally abusive to you? Verbal abuse (sometimes also referred to as emotional abuse) is generally seen in parental or romantic partner relationships, but it can also rear its ugly head in friendships, too.
Verbal Abuse Between Friends
At the heart of abuse is a desire to control the other person. Put downs and insults are meant to tear someone down emotionally, so the person will be less likely to seek out other friends or do activities without the abuser. Verbal abuse can also escalate to things like isolation, where someone tries to prevent you from meeting new people or seeing your current friends.
Verbal abuse is constant over time, and much different than regular friendship conflict. The key to defining verbal abuse in friendships is consistent negative vocal behavior.
In other words, it isn't when you and a friend have an argument (and may say hurtful things) or when a friend is moody (and may snap at you.) Friendships go through ups and downs, and sometimes people disagree and even behave poorly, so it's important to understand the difference between a "regular fight between friends" and verbal abuse.
Signs of Verbal Abuse
Verbal abuse is meant to tear you down emotionally by trying to belittle or even frighten you. If you think your friend might be verbally abusive, watch for these signs:
Telling you that you're stupid all the time
Saying that you won't be able to make new friends
Calling you names (fatty, dummy, moron)
Putting down the good things that happen to you
Blaming you when things go wrong
Making fun of your accomplishments
Telling other people negative things about you
Telling embarrassing things about you in front of other people
Verbal Abuse Between Friends
At the heart of abuse is a desire to control the other person. Put downs and insults are meant to tear someone down emotionally, so the person will be less likely to seek out other friends or do activities without the abuser. Verbal abuse can also escalate to things like isolation, where someone tries to prevent you from meeting new people or seeing your current friends.
Verbal abuse is constant over time, and much different than regular friendship conflict. The key to defining verbal abuse in friendships is consistent negative vocal behavior.
In other words, it isn't when you and a friend have an argument (and may say hurtful things) or when a friend is moody (and may snap at you.) Friendships go through ups and downs, and sometimes people disagree and even behave poorly, so it's important to understand the difference between a "regular fight between friends" and verbal abuse.
Signs of Verbal Abuse
Verbal abuse is meant to tear you down emotionally by trying to belittle or even frighten you. If you think your friend might be verbally abusive, watch for these signs:
Telling you that you're stupid all the time
Saying that you won't be able to make new friends
Calling you names (fatty, dummy, moron)
Putting down the good things that happen to you
Blaming you when things go wrong
Making fun of your accomplishments
Telling other people negative things about you
Telling embarrassing things about you in front of other people
I LOVE THE AKINBOROS'
i believe in family. It’s a six-letter word, with a trillion times the meaning. It’s who we came from, who we live with, who we love. They help shape our lives with who we are today and who we will grow to be.
Family may not just be blood relatives. It can be friends, people who you care about, or the people you are in a group with. I share memories and moments with family that we will remember forever.
My family is perfectly imperfect. We might not be the closest or the most loving family in the world, but we still care. We fight, argue, and even say that we hate each other at times. But it is the small things, the kindness and love in our hearts, when we say and do these things that bring us together. Family is the essence of life. Without them, who and where would I be? A twenty something year old girl with no one to talk to, no one to be with, no one to love. Alone in life, with no one to share memories with as I grow up. Even the bad memories or the memories that are not so good are still special. It helps me grow stronger daily.
When I was younger, and still some today, my family would get together and have dinners about once a month. It would be a bonding time for us, when we would reflect on the day. We would talk about school, friends, and everything else. It was a time for us to come together and remember who we are as a family and just enjoy each other’s company.
My mom is probably has the biggest job in the family. She has to take care of four kids with my dad.She cooks, cleans, and buys us things. I know it is not easy at times, but we make it work. My brother, sister, and I fight all the time. We really do love and care about each other, we just don’t exactly know it yet.
My family fights, we have fun, and we love each other. Family is the essence of life. This I believe. share your family stories with me.
send your write ups to akinboroy@gmail.com
keep loving each other. xxx
Family may not just be blood relatives. It can be friends, people who you care about, or the people you are in a group with. I share memories and moments with family that we will remember forever.
My family is perfectly imperfect. We might not be the closest or the most loving family in the world, but we still care. We fight, argue, and even say that we hate each other at times. But it is the small things, the kindness and love in our hearts, when we say and do these things that bring us together. Family is the essence of life. Without them, who and where would I be? A twenty something year old girl with no one to talk to, no one to be with, no one to love. Alone in life, with no one to share memories with as I grow up. Even the bad memories or the memories that are not so good are still special. It helps me grow stronger daily.
When I was younger, and still some today, my family would get together and have dinners about once a month. It would be a bonding time for us, when we would reflect on the day. We would talk about school, friends, and everything else. It was a time for us to come together and remember who we are as a family and just enjoy each other’s company.
My mom is probably has the biggest job in the family. She has to take care of four kids with my dad.She cooks, cleans, and buys us things. I know it is not easy at times, but we make it work. My brother, sister, and I fight all the time. We really do love and care about each other, we just don’t exactly know it yet.
My family fights, we have fun, and we love each other. Family is the essence of life. This I believe. share your family stories with me.
send your write ups to akinboroy@gmail.com
keep loving each other. xxx
Sunday 28 September 2014
HAPPY SUNDAY GUYS
Its the LAST sunday of the month of SEPTEMBER, I tell you there are so many things to be thankful for! life,family,friends the list is endless. I am particularly grateful for mercy during this month,GOD IS GOD BEST BELIEVE THAT. I want you to always remember to thank HIM for his unflinching LOVE AND MERCY. LASTLY,LETS PRAY FOR NIGERIA.*no jokes*
Keep loving yourself and eachother.
xoxo
Keep loving yourself and eachother.
xoxo
Friday 26 September 2014
TRIBUTE!
Most people often wonder what is the essence of life, if a man is but to live and die at an appointed time. This is because it is known that death is an inevitable visitor that must come and most at times it comes unexpectedly to separate us from our loved ones, wealth, properties among others. Therefore, there is need for people to wonder the essence of life, if life is like an unstable delicate thread that can cut at anytime from any point. What is the meaning of life? People have different answers to this question because to some people life may mean to make wealth and have properties. While to others it may mean to have fun while the life lasts. Few people may see life as a time to serve God and humanity.
Although life started at the time of birth in an unconscious state and ends at the time of death in an unconscious state but at death men are usually buried within a confined space in the ground not minding their wealth, properties, or status in the society. Most men lived, then died, were buried, and forgotten. No wonder King Solomon exclaimed, “Vanity, upon vanity, all is vanity.” Then Paul, the apostle, recognized this fact so he realized that he came to earth with nothing and shall depart with nothing. To Paul “to live is Christ and to die is gain.” Paul can only say this if he is among the few that came to realize that there is something more than life, itself, therefore death is not an end but only a beginning to something greater for those that earn it. No wonder he also said, “In him I live, move, and have my being.” There is need to live a comfortable and a fulfilled life but most men are held by the shackles of this world so they could not think of or see something higher than the things of the earth. That is why many have lived, died, and are forgotten while only few men had continued to live even though they be dead. This is because these few men spent their lives in service to God and humanity. They are those that gave humanity new beginning and new reasons to live in unity, justice, love, and harmony. These few men had dreams which they, at first, saw and had alone so they carried its pains, struggles, and difficulties alone but later and today many men have joined in their dreams because they now understood the meaning and need of those once lonely dreams. In those dreams you will find the dream of your liberty and the liberty of your nation. In those dreams you will find the dream for your right, justice, equity, love, peace, and religious tolerance. In those dreams you will find the dream to end slavery and racism among others. That is why I still say that it is a shame that men are divided by their religious belief just as they were once divided by the color of their skin. This is because many have failed to learn from history even from their own history, pains and struggles. Let us remember that God had always used people to bring changes in due time. No new beginning came easily because all came in pains just as birth is in pains. This life has no meaning when we live it empty without good purpose and dream for a better future for all humanity and target something higher than the physical.
Therefore, as many that are still wondering the essence of life; its essence maybe what we can do for God and Humanity with the life that we have now. It is only when we have done something good with our life that we can say, “yes I live” and we given our life and the life of others a meaning.
RIP ADEMOLA TAOFEEK OJEBIYI "OJEBZ" FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS
Although life started at the time of birth in an unconscious state and ends at the time of death in an unconscious state but at death men are usually buried within a confined space in the ground not minding their wealth, properties, or status in the society. Most men lived, then died, were buried, and forgotten. No wonder King Solomon exclaimed, “Vanity, upon vanity, all is vanity.” Then Paul, the apostle, recognized this fact so he realized that he came to earth with nothing and shall depart with nothing. To Paul “to live is Christ and to die is gain.” Paul can only say this if he is among the few that came to realize that there is something more than life, itself, therefore death is not an end but only a beginning to something greater for those that earn it. No wonder he also said, “In him I live, move, and have my being.” There is need to live a comfortable and a fulfilled life but most men are held by the shackles of this world so they could not think of or see something higher than the things of the earth. That is why many have lived, died, and are forgotten while only few men had continued to live even though they be dead. This is because these few men spent their lives in service to God and humanity. They are those that gave humanity new beginning and new reasons to live in unity, justice, love, and harmony. These few men had dreams which they, at first, saw and had alone so they carried its pains, struggles, and difficulties alone but later and today many men have joined in their dreams because they now understood the meaning and need of those once lonely dreams. In those dreams you will find the dream of your liberty and the liberty of your nation. In those dreams you will find the dream for your right, justice, equity, love, peace, and religious tolerance. In those dreams you will find the dream to end slavery and racism among others. That is why I still say that it is a shame that men are divided by their religious belief just as they were once divided by the color of their skin. This is because many have failed to learn from history even from their own history, pains and struggles. Let us remember that God had always used people to bring changes in due time. No new beginning came easily because all came in pains just as birth is in pains. This life has no meaning when we live it empty without good purpose and dream for a better future for all humanity and target something higher than the physical.
Therefore, as many that are still wondering the essence of life; its essence maybe what we can do for God and Humanity with the life that we have now. It is only when we have done something good with our life that we can say, “yes I live” and we given our life and the life of others a meaning.
RIP ADEMOLA TAOFEEK OJEBIYI "OJEBZ" FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS
Wednesday 24 September 2014
WHAT DOES WATER DO!!!
Roughly 60 percent of the body is made of water. Drinking enough H2O maintains The body’s fluid balance, which helps transport nutrients in the body, regulate body temperature, digest food, and more.
Calorie control. Forget other diet tricks—drinking water could also help with weight loss. Numerous studies have found a connection between water consumption and losing a few pounds [4] [5]. The secret reason? Water simply helps people feel full, and as a result consume fewer calories.
Muscle fuel. Sweating at the gym causes muscles to lose water. And when the muscles don’t have enough water, they get tired [6]. So for extra energy, try drinking water to push through that final set of squats.
Clearer skin. Certain toxins in the body can cause the skin to inflame, which results in clogged pores and acne [7]. While science saying water makes the skin wrinkle free is contradictory, water does flush out these toxins and can reduce the risk of pimples.
Kidney function. Our kidneys process 200 quarts of blood daily, sifting out waste and transporting urine to the bladder. Yet, kidneys need enough fluids to clear away what we don’t need in the body. Let's drink to that!
Productivity boost. In order to really focus, a glass of water could help people concentrate and stay refreshed and alert.
Fatigue buster. Move over coffee—water can help fight those tired eyes too [8]. One of the most common symptoms of dehydration is tiredness. Just another reason to go for the big gulp! (Not the 7-11 kind.)
Hangover help. If booze has got the best of you, help a hangover with a glass of water to hydrate the body and stop that pounding headache.
Pain prevention. A little water can really go a long way. Aching joints and muscle cramps and strains can all occur if the body is dehydrated [9].
Keep things flowing. Nobody wants to deal with digestion issues. Luckily, drinking enough water adds fluids to the colon which helps make things, ahem, move smoothly.
Sickness fighter. Water may help with decongestion and dehydration, helping the body bounce back when feeling under the weather. Just beware—drinking fluids hasn’t been scientifically proven to beat colds in one swoop, so don’t swap this for a trip to the doctor or other cold remedies.
Brain boost. A study in London found a link between students bringing water into an exam room and better grades, suggesting H2O promotes clearer thinking. While it’s unclear if drinking the water had anything to do with a better score, it doesn’t hurt to try it out!
Bottoms Up—Your Action Plan
The amount of water people need per day is up for debate, but studies suggest adults need nine to 16 cups of H2O. However, this number varies depending on activity level, age, and how much water people are consuming in coffee, tea, or water-rich veggies and fruit.
Here’s how to keep yourself hydrated: Begin by drinking a glass of water as soon as you wake up, and 30 minutes before eating any big meal. (This will help control appetite, too.) Get in the habit of keeping a water bottle on hand at all times. And if the taste beings to bore, spice up the taste buds with a squeeze of citrus to the glass! Before you know it, all the benefits of water will be right at your fingertips…. and in your body.
Calorie control. Forget other diet tricks—drinking water could also help with weight loss. Numerous studies have found a connection between water consumption and losing a few pounds [4] [5]. The secret reason? Water simply helps people feel full, and as a result consume fewer calories.
Muscle fuel. Sweating at the gym causes muscles to lose water. And when the muscles don’t have enough water, they get tired [6]. So for extra energy, try drinking water to push through that final set of squats.
Clearer skin. Certain toxins in the body can cause the skin to inflame, which results in clogged pores and acne [7]. While science saying water makes the skin wrinkle free is contradictory, water does flush out these toxins and can reduce the risk of pimples.
Kidney function. Our kidneys process 200 quarts of blood daily, sifting out waste and transporting urine to the bladder. Yet, kidneys need enough fluids to clear away what we don’t need in the body. Let's drink to that!
Productivity boost. In order to really focus, a glass of water could help people concentrate and stay refreshed and alert.
Fatigue buster. Move over coffee—water can help fight those tired eyes too [8]. One of the most common symptoms of dehydration is tiredness. Just another reason to go for the big gulp! (Not the 7-11 kind.)
Hangover help. If booze has got the best of you, help a hangover with a glass of water to hydrate the body and stop that pounding headache.
Pain prevention. A little water can really go a long way. Aching joints and muscle cramps and strains can all occur if the body is dehydrated [9].
Keep things flowing. Nobody wants to deal with digestion issues. Luckily, drinking enough water adds fluids to the colon which helps make things, ahem, move smoothly.
Sickness fighter. Water may help with decongestion and dehydration, helping the body bounce back when feeling under the weather. Just beware—drinking fluids hasn’t been scientifically proven to beat colds in one swoop, so don’t swap this for a trip to the doctor or other cold remedies.
Brain boost. A study in London found a link between students bringing water into an exam room and better grades, suggesting H2O promotes clearer thinking. While it’s unclear if drinking the water had anything to do with a better score, it doesn’t hurt to try it out!
Bottoms Up—Your Action Plan
The amount of water people need per day is up for debate, but studies suggest adults need nine to 16 cups of H2O. However, this number varies depending on activity level, age, and how much water people are consuming in coffee, tea, or water-rich veggies and fruit.
Here’s how to keep yourself hydrated: Begin by drinking a glass of water as soon as you wake up, and 30 minutes before eating any big meal. (This will help control appetite, too.) Get in the habit of keeping a water bottle on hand at all times. And if the taste beings to bore, spice up the taste buds with a squeeze of citrus to the glass! Before you know it, all the benefits of water will be right at your fingertips…. and in your body.
LIFE AFTER........
So this is life after college.
When you were in college, you probably felt like it was never going to end. You felt untouchable, invincible, that you could do anything you wanted. And then you graduated. Yes, and everything changed.
What happens after college? Suddenly, your friends are dispersed across the country. Your new best friend is the computer and its endless supply of completely useless job search engines, all of which tell you that your degree is best suited for the United States Air Force. You move back home and realize your parents are exactly the same as you left them. You get a shitty job (if you can find one at all!) and before you’ve even received your diploma in the mail you realize that this is it… this is life after college graduation. And six months after this horrific epiphany — HOLY SHIT! — the grace periods end on your thousands of dollars in student loans! Before you’ve had the chance to grasp the fact that your entire life of education is over, you are jobless, alone, and in serious, serious debt.
“…this BLOG is my attempt to rile the masses… before we’re all tied ball-and-chain to some corporate desk.”
This is the story of my post-college experience. Of your post-college experience. And almost everyone from our generation— it’s their post-college experience. Life after college is, at first, one tough reality after another.
I say, now is the time to “Seize the Day”.
You have your whole life to figure out where you are going to live and work. And this website is actually a great jumping off point for just that kind of research. But right now is the time to travel. See the world. Experience life. Go skydiving. Learn yoga. Sell your stuff on eBay and join the circus. For chrissakes, live a little. You are only young once, and this website is my guide to life after college— an attempt to rile the masses and get the young hearts and minds of today on a mission to see and experience first-hand what this world has to offer… before we’re all tied ball-and-chain to some corporate desk.
There is no better time than now.
Go back to school, if the fire is in you. Organize your life. Minimize your belongings. Sort out your relationships. Learn about your family. But whatever you choose to do, do it whole-heartedly and don’t give up. Find your own path and remember that every other college graduate out there is going through his/her own turmoil just like you.
The first few years of life after college are your glimpse at the “real world” and truly, the bounce-board into the rest of your life. So jump right in— and enjoy every goddamn minute of it.
‘Cause this is it. It’s now or never. Culled from a write up in NY TIMES.
When you were in college, you probably felt like it was never going to end. You felt untouchable, invincible, that you could do anything you wanted. And then you graduated. Yes, and everything changed.
What happens after college? Suddenly, your friends are dispersed across the country. Your new best friend is the computer and its endless supply of completely useless job search engines, all of which tell you that your degree is best suited for the United States Air Force. You move back home and realize your parents are exactly the same as you left them. You get a shitty job (if you can find one at all!) and before you’ve even received your diploma in the mail you realize that this is it… this is life after college graduation. And six months after this horrific epiphany — HOLY SHIT! — the grace periods end on your thousands of dollars in student loans! Before you’ve had the chance to grasp the fact that your entire life of education is over, you are jobless, alone, and in serious, serious debt.
“…this BLOG is my attempt to rile the masses… before we’re all tied ball-and-chain to some corporate desk.”
This is the story of my post-college experience. Of your post-college experience. And almost everyone from our generation— it’s their post-college experience. Life after college is, at first, one tough reality after another.
I say, now is the time to “Seize the Day”.
You have your whole life to figure out where you are going to live and work. And this website is actually a great jumping off point for just that kind of research. But right now is the time to travel. See the world. Experience life. Go skydiving. Learn yoga. Sell your stuff on eBay and join the circus. For chrissakes, live a little. You are only young once, and this website is my guide to life after college— an attempt to rile the masses and get the young hearts and minds of today on a mission to see and experience first-hand what this world has to offer… before we’re all tied ball-and-chain to some corporate desk.
There is no better time than now.
Go back to school, if the fire is in you. Organize your life. Minimize your belongings. Sort out your relationships. Learn about your family. But whatever you choose to do, do it whole-heartedly and don’t give up. Find your own path and remember that every other college graduate out there is going through his/her own turmoil just like you.
The first few years of life after college are your glimpse at the “real world” and truly, the bounce-board into the rest of your life. So jump right in— and enjoy every goddamn minute of it.
‘Cause this is it. It’s now or never. Culled from a write up in NY TIMES.
Tuesday 23 September 2014
Let's Talk& Learn
Signs of Emotional Immaturity
We all have bad days and at times have our own individual temper tantrums. Sometimes, we simply feel bored and need to look for something to do. But for some people, these traits can get in the way of having a good relationship. Consider the following signs of emotional immaturity:
Emotional Volatility: This generally refers to the tendency for your emotions to get out of your control. Review the list below and if you notice one of more of these traits in yourself or someone you care about, emotional volatility may be a problem:
• temper tantrums, like screaming, yelling, breaking things or hitting others
• getting upset extremely easily, having a low frustration level
• responses out of proportion, that is, making a mountain out of a mole hill
• inability to take criticism, rather taking it too personally or taking yourself too seriously
• extreme jealousy,
• unwillingness to forgive,
• unpredictable fluctuation of moods
Lack of Independence: People who have a balance of independence vs dependence are both relatively self-reliant and cooperative with other people. An unhealthy dependence has the following characteristics:
• too reliant on others for things you can do for yourself
• needing someone around all the time
• not having your own opinions, or being willing/able to express them
• being very easily influenced by others
• prejudging other people
Constant Attention and Gratification Seeking: Emotionally immature people spend a lot of time and energy looking for attention and gratification from other people. This is characterized by:
• superficial values
• loyalty that lasts only as long as the person views the relationship as "useful"
• needing immediate gratification which may result in financial or personal problems
• thoughtless and impulsive behavior
Extreme self-centeredness: Self-centered people are often viewed as selfish. Usually, this suggests having low self-esteem, self-centred people can be extremely competitive, make unreasonable demands, are constantly preoccupied with themselves, seek out positive feedback or sympathy relentlessly, and don't tend to accept responsibility for anything.
In summary, the emotionally immature person can't understand the needs and feelings of others, and therefore have a difficult time being a partner or a parent.
We all have bad days and at times have our own individual temper tantrums. Sometimes, we simply feel bored and need to look for something to do. But for some people, these traits can get in the way of having a good relationship. Consider the following signs of emotional immaturity:
Emotional Volatility: This generally refers to the tendency for your emotions to get out of your control. Review the list below and if you notice one of more of these traits in yourself or someone you care about, emotional volatility may be a problem:
• temper tantrums, like screaming, yelling, breaking things or hitting others
• getting upset extremely easily, having a low frustration level
• responses out of proportion, that is, making a mountain out of a mole hill
• inability to take criticism, rather taking it too personally or taking yourself too seriously
• extreme jealousy,
• unwillingness to forgive,
• unpredictable fluctuation of moods
Lack of Independence: People who have a balance of independence vs dependence are both relatively self-reliant and cooperative with other people. An unhealthy dependence has the following characteristics:
• too reliant on others for things you can do for yourself
• needing someone around all the time
• not having your own opinions, or being willing/able to express them
• being very easily influenced by others
• prejudging other people
Constant Attention and Gratification Seeking: Emotionally immature people spend a lot of time and energy looking for attention and gratification from other people. This is characterized by:
• superficial values
• loyalty that lasts only as long as the person views the relationship as "useful"
• needing immediate gratification which may result in financial or personal problems
• thoughtless and impulsive behavior
Extreme self-centeredness: Self-centered people are often viewed as selfish. Usually, this suggests having low self-esteem, self-centred people can be extremely competitive, make unreasonable demands, are constantly preoccupied with themselves, seek out positive feedback or sympathy relentlessly, and don't tend to accept responsibility for anything.
In summary, the emotionally immature person can't understand the needs and feelings of others, and therefore have a difficult time being a partner or a parent.
HOLD UP! I NEED YOU TO BREATHE
EBOLA exists. if you think it doesnt check in on the left hand side of YABA.
I entered "danfo" recently! (for those who dont know what that is,i mean commercial bus in lagos) everybody in the bus became a suspect. I just did not stop sanitizing my hands and arms everytime i had a contact with persons in the bus especially the conductor, he was the biggest suspect to me. The worst part is you have to surrender yourself to the federal or state government in order to be "quarantined" oyinbo"big grammar".
My friend Okoya T. told me nobody welcomed him in his new church somewhere in port harcourt because of the fear of this horrible disease. My other friends are freaking out! Ebola scares us all! but my question is this,if your partner is positive
how can you show him or her that you love him or her? HIV/AIDS beta pass EBOLA BUT NONE GOOD SHA*chewing bitterleaf and sipping sprite*.
Goodnight.
I entered "danfo" recently! (for those who dont know what that is,i mean commercial bus in lagos) everybody in the bus became a suspect. I just did not stop sanitizing my hands and arms everytime i had a contact with persons in the bus especially the conductor, he was the biggest suspect to me. The worst part is you have to surrender yourself to the federal or state government in order to be "quarantined" oyinbo"big grammar".
My friend Okoya T. told me nobody welcomed him in his new church somewhere in port harcourt because of the fear of this horrible disease. My other friends are freaking out! Ebola scares us all! but my question is this,if your partner is positive
how can you show him or her that you love him or her? HIV/AIDS beta pass EBOLA BUT NONE GOOD SHA*chewing bitterleaf and sipping sprite*.
Goodnight.
COMMUNICATION IN RELATIONSHIPS!!!
The little things
Do you say a warm good morning to your mate when you first wake up, or roll your eyes and complain about how many times she hit the snooze button? When you suggest a movie, does your partner discuss it with you or does he put down your suggestion? Over time, these relatively brief exchanges add up to form the basis of a relationship.
Paying attention to the small moments and investing them with attention and importance can make a big difference toward a couple’s overall satisfaction in their relationship.
After the honeymoon
When people date, they tend to spend a lot of time and energy on getting to know one another, talking and listening, making each other feel good with favors and compliments, holding hands, having sex, and finding fun and creative activities to try together. Naturally, all this attention creates closeness and a foundation for a bigger commitment. Once that commitment is made, however, priorities may change with responsibilities at work, starting a family, or simply falling into a predictable routine.
Making or scheduling time to connect both emotionally and physically—much in the same way you did when you were first dating—is an important way to maintain and grow your relationship.
Take care of yourself
Stress can tax the healthiest relationships. Whether it’s a new baby, financial pressures, job changes, or the day-to-day grind, one of the best things you can do for your relationship is take time to manage your own stress in healthy ways. When you do this, it’s easier to be supportive of your partner. Tapping into social support is one of the most important ways to manage stress.
Researchers have found that being able to talk about your problems—even ordinary stresses and strains—with friends as well as with your partner can help protect your relationship
Do you say a warm good morning to your mate when you first wake up, or roll your eyes and complain about how many times she hit the snooze button? When you suggest a movie, does your partner discuss it with you or does he put down your suggestion? Over time, these relatively brief exchanges add up to form the basis of a relationship.
Paying attention to the small moments and investing them with attention and importance can make a big difference toward a couple’s overall satisfaction in their relationship.
After the honeymoon
When people date, they tend to spend a lot of time and energy on getting to know one another, talking and listening, making each other feel good with favors and compliments, holding hands, having sex, and finding fun and creative activities to try together. Naturally, all this attention creates closeness and a foundation for a bigger commitment. Once that commitment is made, however, priorities may change with responsibilities at work, starting a family, or simply falling into a predictable routine.
Making or scheduling time to connect both emotionally and physically—much in the same way you did when you were first dating—is an important way to maintain and grow your relationship.
Take care of yourself
Stress can tax the healthiest relationships. Whether it’s a new baby, financial pressures, job changes, or the day-to-day grind, one of the best things you can do for your relationship is take time to manage your own stress in healthy ways. When you do this, it’s easier to be supportive of your partner. Tapping into social support is one of the most important ways to manage stress.
Researchers have found that being able to talk about your problems—even ordinary stresses and strains—with friends as well as with your partner can help protect your relationship
Sunday 21 September 2014
FRIENDSHIP TO ME :)
There aren't many things more important than friendship. A friend is someone you can talk with about a problem, someone who is always there when you need a hand, someone you can trust with your deepest secrets, someone who makes you laugh, or even someone you can poke on Facebook. And a friend can be anyone or anything: a parent, a sibling, a classmate, a pet, a stuffed animal, or even invisible. I could go on but.... its night time here.
If you have a good friend dont ever let go.......
Love and Peace. xxx
If you have a good friend dont ever let go.......
Love and Peace. xxx
WHY DO YOU WANT LOVE ANYWAY?
Some women look at being single as something to fix. After age 25 and your friends all start to marry, the process of filling that perceived hole in your life begins. Family, friends and co-workers ask if you are dating someone and it feels like something is wrong if you are not in a relationship. You get drawn into the need to find a man that you find it silly to answer the question, “Why do you want love?”
Humans are social creatures and it is natural for you to want to connect and bond with others. Being single can be lonely at times, especially when you get older and your single friends are dropping off the face of the earth into the picket fence lifestyle. You may spend holiday weekends or Saturday evenings alone which can be very isolating and depressing. When you are single, it feels like a couples’ world that you have not received an invitation to yet.
You may judge yourself harshly for not having a partner and search self-help books and workshops to fix yourself enough so someone would love you. This behavior is akin to walking on a treadmill, analyzing your past, your limitations and fears only to perpetuate what you focus on. If you only found your true love, then you would be okay….healed.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a life partner, but you must be clear on why you want a partner so that you can have a healthy relationship that lasts. If you are just filling in a void, you will probably settle for someone that serves that purpose. If you are looking to feel better about yourself, you will attract someone that consistently lets you down. No one can fill you up with confidence; you have to do that job by yourself.
Take a piece a paper out in your journal and write across to the top, “Why do I want love?” and then free-write everything that comes to your mind. You may be surprised at what comes out of you. Do you want to share a wonderful life with someone or do you want him or her to give you something that you perceive you lack?
Some examples of the hidden desires for relationships are to feel accepted, loved, worthy, or healed. Many singles just don’t want to be alone; they can’t stand themselves and need another person to distract them. Some singles desire love because they are desperate for attention. They want to show off their pretty engagement ring, plan the wedding, and feel like they are part of the couples club. Once the hoopla ends, they are left with a husband that they probably do not love.
In order to find true love, you must get to the root of your desire and what the relationship will serve for you. Unhealthy relationships are created by one or both parties getting involved for selfish reasons to feed their ego and unmet needs. True love is not about having the other person make your life better, but by you being perfectly happy now and wanting to share that happiness. You don’t want to attract someone to “complete” you but to harmonize with you. HAVE A BLESSED WEEK! Xxx
Humans are social creatures and it is natural for you to want to connect and bond with others. Being single can be lonely at times, especially when you get older and your single friends are dropping off the face of the earth into the picket fence lifestyle. You may spend holiday weekends or Saturday evenings alone which can be very isolating and depressing. When you are single, it feels like a couples’ world that you have not received an invitation to yet.
You may judge yourself harshly for not having a partner and search self-help books and workshops to fix yourself enough so someone would love you. This behavior is akin to walking on a treadmill, analyzing your past, your limitations and fears only to perpetuate what you focus on. If you only found your true love, then you would be okay….healed.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a life partner, but you must be clear on why you want a partner so that you can have a healthy relationship that lasts. If you are just filling in a void, you will probably settle for someone that serves that purpose. If you are looking to feel better about yourself, you will attract someone that consistently lets you down. No one can fill you up with confidence; you have to do that job by yourself.
Take a piece a paper out in your journal and write across to the top, “Why do I want love?” and then free-write everything that comes to your mind. You may be surprised at what comes out of you. Do you want to share a wonderful life with someone or do you want him or her to give you something that you perceive you lack?
Some examples of the hidden desires for relationships are to feel accepted, loved, worthy, or healed. Many singles just don’t want to be alone; they can’t stand themselves and need another person to distract them. Some singles desire love because they are desperate for attention. They want to show off their pretty engagement ring, plan the wedding, and feel like they are part of the couples club. Once the hoopla ends, they are left with a husband that they probably do not love.
In order to find true love, you must get to the root of your desire and what the relationship will serve for you. Unhealthy relationships are created by one or both parties getting involved for selfish reasons to feed their ego and unmet needs. True love is not about having the other person make your life better, but by you being perfectly happy now and wanting to share that happiness. You don’t want to attract someone to “complete” you but to harmonize with you. HAVE A BLESSED WEEK! Xxx
WHAT DOES SEX MEAN TO YOU? A WRITER'S OPINION
Sex means different things to different people, and what it means to you might be having a big effect on your relationship Wanting sex to share love comes from a completely different place inside than sex to get something. In order to have love and connection to share, you have to already be connected with yourself and feel filled with love. Pleasure, fun , feeling loved, cherished and sexy ( there is nothing sexier than feeling sexy IMO) and sharing something unique and exclusive with the man I love. Being able to discover each other and ourselves , being able to laugh at each other ( sex can be so silly if you can't laugh then I think you are missing out).
Sex to me is the natural progression of love,respect and desire. I love sex because it brings me closer to someone I grow with every day.
Sex is also about being someone who can pick up on the other's desires and considering your lover's pleasure as well as your own. Selfish sex to me is pointless. It is as much about giving as about receiving.
I also think it is about being willing to make yourself vulnerable to the other , something which means a lot and shows one is comfortable with their partner.
I cannot personally imagine having sex with someone I did not love. For me that would be empty and would make me feel cheap and demeaned as a human being.
I adore my husband ( even when I "hate" him... and want to throw things at him) and being sexually exclusive is not just a "moral" choice to me, in fact it is not a choice. I can admire other men's beauty but have no desire to sleep with any of them. Because sex to me is about something deeper than simple copulation and penetration.
Sex is hugely important in a relationship but to me if you haven't got love, fun, laughter, and even tears and sorrow, if you don't share yourself as well as your body then you have nothing. I know... very old fashioned... It is about more than uniting your body but also your "souls" to put it tritely.
Me like sex very much, fun and games and all that....
I never understand people who find sex dirty ! It's supposed to be dirty ! And beautiful and fun and pleasurable....t share something that you don’t already have.
You cannot share love and connection when you feel unhappy, empty, inadequate, unlovable, disconnected from yourself, stressed or agitated, angry or needing to feel in control of your partner.
If you and your partner are having sexual problems, you each may want to examine the system between you. Is there a control-resist system? Is there a control-compliance system? Is there a compliance-compliance system? Any of these systems may be bypassing the true sharing of love and joy that sexuality between loving, caring partners offers.
Sex to me is the natural progression of love,respect and desire. I love sex because it brings me closer to someone I grow with every day.
Sex is also about being someone who can pick up on the other's desires and considering your lover's pleasure as well as your own. Selfish sex to me is pointless. It is as much about giving as about receiving.
I also think it is about being willing to make yourself vulnerable to the other , something which means a lot and shows one is comfortable with their partner.
I cannot personally imagine having sex with someone I did not love. For me that would be empty and would make me feel cheap and demeaned as a human being.
I adore my husband ( even when I "hate" him... and want to throw things at him) and being sexually exclusive is not just a "moral" choice to me, in fact it is not a choice. I can admire other men's beauty but have no desire to sleep with any of them. Because sex to me is about something deeper than simple copulation and penetration.
Sex is hugely important in a relationship but to me if you haven't got love, fun, laughter, and even tears and sorrow, if you don't share yourself as well as your body then you have nothing. I know... very old fashioned... It is about more than uniting your body but also your "souls" to put it tritely.
Me like sex very much, fun and games and all that....
I never understand people who find sex dirty ! It's supposed to be dirty ! And beautiful and fun and pleasurable....t share something that you don’t already have.
You cannot share love and connection when you feel unhappy, empty, inadequate, unlovable, disconnected from yourself, stressed or agitated, angry or needing to feel in control of your partner.
If you and your partner are having sexual problems, you each may want to examine the system between you. Is there a control-resist system? Is there a control-compliance system? Is there a compliance-compliance system? Any of these systems may be bypassing the true sharing of love and joy that sexuality between loving, caring partners offers.
MY LAW SCHOOL EXPERIENCE
Its been a long while i posted anything on here. i have to be honest i missed that. i have been busy in law school. i was posted to the nigerian law school in Enugu State! funny but true it was a wonderful experience. i met so many people from diverse parts of the country,the good,the bad and the ugly. the registration process was exhausting. long ques and lazy admin staff trying to feel too relevant but i got fixed in no time. i got a room and lived with five other wonderful people but everyday was a new story. even though i miss the law school experience i am super glad its over. God was wonderful to me throughout that journey. shout out to my friends who became family! JADESOLA BALOGUN, INUMIDUN ERINKITOLA,MARTINS ASAOLU,UZOMA OKOLI,KIKE ADEWALURE,EBAIDE OMIUNU,ANDREW OWOEYE*blushing* many more. see you all in ICC ABUJA NOVEMBER 25 BY GOD'S GRACE. xxx
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